Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
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