we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
