i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
