you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize