just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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