I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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