If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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