she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
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