Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
