Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
