I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
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