Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
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