you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
