Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Randomize
