pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
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