I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
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