No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
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