i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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