I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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