Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
Randomize
