She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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