I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Randomize
