OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Randomize