Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
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