You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
