Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
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