walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
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