Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
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