I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Randomize
