The brown eye won't let me do that either.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Randomize
