we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
you didnt know i had herpes?
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
