Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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