I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
