Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
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