Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
