o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
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