Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Randomize
