If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
We have started to decorate penises.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
