it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Shame - the story of my life.
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