with your own penis?
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Randomize
