don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
