im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Randomize
