i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
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