Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Randomize