i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize