i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
