More tranny stories later!
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
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