No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
