how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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