im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
PANTIES FOUND
Randomize
