woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
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