i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Randomize
