Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
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